The Power of NO

The older I get, the more I’ve embraced the word, ‘No’. 

The fact is, saying ‘no’ is a learned skill. (Say it with me…”No.” Feels pretty good, right?)

For some of us, saying ‘no’ is extremely challenging (I’m looking at you, people pleasers). Even the thought of disappointing someone makes you break out in a rash.

But saying ‘yes’ to every request made of your time and energy will ultimately leave you depleted and ineffective. You can’t possibly do everything you’re asked to do. There aren’t enough hours in the day.

So you and I have to choose our yes’s and our no’s very carefully.

Remember: If you say ‘yes’ to something, you’re essentially saying ‘no’ to everything else. 

I want to make sure my yes’s and my no’s reflect my priorities and they allow me to live out my God-given calling. Here are the things I’ve learned to say ‘no’ to:

 

-Say NO to busy-ness. Be picky with your ‘YES’

Those who live with an overwhelmed schedule often live with an underwhelmed soul.

The problem is that we’re all so used to saying yes without thinking about it—and that’s a bad habit. 

It means we’re letting ourselves get pulled into the busy-ness of life, instead of being intentional about what we say yes to. When we say yes to things just because they seem urgent or important (or sometimes just because they’re fun), we end up with so much on our plates that we can’t possibly do it all well. 

We end up doing a lot of things poorly at best, or, at worst, simply not doing them at all!

 

-Say NO to doing everything on your own.

You can’t do everything yourself.

Trust me, I know that’s a hard pill to swallow. I love being in control and doing things on my own—but it’s time to let go. Delegation is not just something we should do when we’re overwhelmed; it’s something we should do as a part of the normal rhythm of life.

Why? For one thing, delegating gives the people around you the opportunity to shine. They’ll learn new skills, gain confidence in their abilities, and feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves.

But more importantly? You’ll get more done. By handing off some of your responsibilities, you can focus on what matters.

 

–Say NO to life without boundaries Schedule things like family time and quiet time

If you only put things like appointments or meetings on your calendar, it will fill up with other people’s priorities in a hurry. Make sure you are scheduling time to get your work done, as well as family time, date nights, quiet time etc. 

What if you could say “no” to an open calendar, and instead schedule things that matter to YOU?

You know—family time and quiet time. The stuff that helps you recharge your batteries and feel like a human being rather than a human doing. 

I believe in saying yes to these things—and Step 1 is to get them on your calendar for good.

I hope that as you schedule out your days, you begin to embrace ‘no’. Not in an effort to be negative or difficult, but to be able to live intentionally and give your best ‘yes’ to the things that matter most.